I grew up in a world totally inhabited by Lithuanian immigrants, where cucumbers were always served as paper-thin slices floating in a bowl of sour cream lightly kissed with white vinegar, or else as spears fished out of the brine in which they had been pickled. It was not until I shared lunch with a member of that exotic and privileged species known as a "born American" that I realized cucumbers could be eaten unadorned and raw. Now they rank only behind tomatoes as my favorite greenhouse inhabitants.

And these aren't the cucumbers your parents grew: warty, dark green, with bitterness often lurking even in the most perfectly formed specimen. Oh, you can still find the short blunt varieties that have been popular for years, but there are also 122 other kinds commonly available from American seed merchants.

To mention just a few, there's the football shaped Carosello Mezzo Lungo Barese, the oblong and white Katsura Giant Pickling, the sweet Tokiwa Jihai, the international winner in the weight category (11 lb. 6 oz.) most appropriately called the Zeppelin and three varieties with "burpless" in the name. My favorites are the Holland Hybrid (aka..nglish Long) and Lemon cukes. The former are unfailingly sweet and virtually seedless; the latter are an eye-catching round shape and yellow color, with a heavily seeded and juicy center.

I also always grow Armenian cucumbers, whose pale gray-green fruit have scalloped edges and are crisp and fresh tasting. Technically, Armenians are melons, but they taste like cukes, have virtually the same growth habits and are eaten as a vegetable, not a sweet fruit.

This year I am going to try two new types: Kidma and Painted Serpent. Kidmas are from the Middle East, and the skin is so delicate and the centers so tender that these cukes generally are not shipped to markets in the United States. Painted Serpent is known in Australia but seldom seen in this country. The fruits are thin, with a light green base and dark green ribs. They need to be trellised, so that the 18-inch-long fruits can twist into their snake-like formation. (Both varieties are available through Shepherd's Garden Seeds, which are sold by several local nurseries.)

Many people have shied away from growing cukes because they have a reputation for being tricky to pollinate, and novices feel intimidated by the terms monoecious, gynoecious and parthenocarpic. Monoecious cukes have separate male and female flowers on the same plant; gynoecious cukes have only female flowers, although a male flower may appear on occasion--especially during times of stress such as inadequate water, extreme crowding or desert heat.

Gynoecious cuke seed packets include special seeds that produce plants with many male flowers, so that the female flower bearing plants will have an adequate source of pollen. So, why would anyone go to the trouble of growing gynoecious cultivars, when monoecious types are guaranteed to have both male and female flowers? Because gynoecious types have a greater yield over a shorter period of time; additionally, I find them less frustrating because sometimes monoecious types produce male flowers that have virtually disappeared by the time the female blossoms are ready.

Parthenocarpic cukes avoid the problem altogether, requiring no fertilization. In fact, if accidentally pollinated some varieties will produce deformed inedible cukes. Why, then, doesn't everyone stick to this type of cucumber? Because parthenocarpic types such as the Holland Hybrid do not have seeds, which some people like. The seeds are also more expensive, because it is harder for growers to produce them. And with only a few exceptions, parthenocarpics are not suitable for pickling.

When you are selecting the cukes you will grow, it is not only pollination habits you need to pay attention to, for space and use requirements are also critical factors. If you cannot trellis, or have a very small growing area, the compact bush cultivars may be what you require. And if you want to put up pickles, look for varieties that are specially designated as such. There are several "dual-purpose" types, which are good for pickling when small but turn into slicers if left to age and enlarge.Regardless of the variety, all have similar needs: plenty of water (this vegetable is 95 percent water) but not wet feet, soil that is nutritious and well-worked, and warmth with at least 8 hours of sun per day. Frankly, adequate watering and good soil are not usually the problem--it is the heat and sun that are difficult to guarantee.

Start by making sure you do not start your seeds too early; three to four weeks before transplanting is sufficient. If you are using purchased seedlings, don't set them out at the first hint of warm weather. It is better to wait until the end of the first week of June, than to expose them to the unpredictable cruelties of the last weeks of May.

Some local gardeners have felt that cukes require a greenhouse, but while that certainly makes life easier, the lack of one is not a total barrier to rearing this vegetable. There are ways to compensate for some of the rigors the plants will endure: use raised boxes or mounds where the soil is draped in black plastic, put each plant in the center of a triangle windbreak of clear plastic, trellis the vines inside a circular tomato cage that sports an overcoat of a clear plastic garbage bag, or set the plant against the side of the house with a southern exposure.

Finally, cucumbers, especially the bush varieties, make excellent container plants. I have seen wonderful combinations of dwarf cucumbers and cherry tomato plants, with edgings of red and green leaf lettuce or mizuna, set on decks where they are easily accessible to the kitchen. No matter where you plant them, don't over-handle the vines, especially when they are wet. In fact, it is best to water at the base of the plant, rather than using an overhead system. Pick when the fruits are small, as they will be sweeter and the plant will produce more--yield slows or stops when old cukes are left hanging about on the vine.

If you are not ready to try cucumbers this year, plan to save a spot for them next summer. You won't want to miss the orange-fleshed cucumbers Garden City Seeds plans to introduce in 1998.

It was a good year for cukes, old and new

I only grow cucumbers because I am married--personally I am just as happy with a young zucchini. However, my husband uncomplainingly builds any gardening contraption I can imagine; raising the only vegetable he truly loves is the least I can do. This year, in honor of the new greenhouse he built last spring, I grew five varieties of cucumbers: Kidma, Painted Serpent, Lemon, Holland Hybrid English Longs and The Duke Armenian cukes.

I first heard of Kidma cucumbers in a 1995 Organic Gardening article by Barbara Pleasant, "Easiest Cucumbers Ever!" And, boy, was she right! Every single seed germinated and quickly. The plants were sturdy and did not succumb to any pests or diseases. But best of all was how quickly Kidmas went from seed to salad: 54 days. Further, this superior production rate never faltered--as I write this column on Aug. 24th, we have several in the fridge and many more on the vine.

Kidmas taste best when young, no longer than 5 inches and slender. Aging does not bring out the best in them, because they turn yellowish and bitter when left on the vine too long. You'll know the senior cukes by their girth, for middle-aged Kidmas do not grow longer, only obese. If you find a Kidma that looks as if it has been abusing steroids, chuck it to the poultry or compost heap.

I was attracted to the Painted Serpent the moment I spied its picture in the catalog. Pale green, with dark green stripes running the length of its slender, loosely corkscrewed shape, I couldn't wait to display the first ones to my gardening buddies. Unfortunately, I had to wait quite some time, because it took me a while to figure out that I would have to hand pollinate each blossom.

And it took me even longer to be able to tell the male from the female blossoms--unlike many varieties of vegetables, the females blossoms are found atop a long, slender, immature cuke and the males sit on tiny stems clustered along the vine. I am embarrassed to admit that I wasted many of the first fruits because I was pulling off the females and rubbing them into the male flowers. Obviously, I need more lessons in cucumber match-making.

What finally did emerge was an unusual cucumber, in shape, color and size. The skin was faintly fuzzy, although that characteristic faded as the fruit grew. The cream green base, with the dark green stripes was eye-catching, as was the wiry, curling figure. However, like the fuzz, the curves disappeared as the cukes grew; the taste remained juicy, if bland, even in Painted Serpents that had thickened and straightened.

Hidden behind foliage, several Painted Serpents reached nearly a yard in length, as the picture accompanying this article will testify. Even at that size, the fruit was not bitter, just drier and not as crunchy. Mind you, I am not recommending deliberately leaving them to grow into giants, as they are clearly beyond their prime at that stage. However, unlike Kidmas, they are still edible at that size.

The biggest problems with the Painted Serpents were the small harvest and the incredible length of the slender vines. I definitely would not recommend this variety for the gardener struggling with greenhouse space. Vines that take up this much room should at least produce a proportionately large crop.

The third member of my greenhouse cucumber family was the Holland Hybrid. I have grown other members of the English cuke family but not Holland Hybrid. I wish I had discovered this variety earlier, because the vines were flawless performers, each prolifically producing dozens of cukes. Long (12 inches or more) and slender, with a dark green coloring, every one I tasted was crisp and juicy. The best part was that, since they are self-pollinating, the plants needed no attention beyond attaching them to trellises.

The other two types I grew are old family favorites: The Duke Armenian and Lemon cucumbers. Actually, Armenians are not really cucumbers; they are part of the melon family. However, their crisp texture and mild (but not sweet) flavor, long and scalloped cylindrical shape and pale green color have resulted in their being marketed as a salad vegetable instead of a sweet fruit.

As a crop, Armenians rate as somewhat finicky, quick to succumb to disease, and with vines and leaves that gobble up space. The production rates are also dismal, especially when compared to Holland Hybrids. But, since I grow them primarily for their unusual appearance, I am willing to put up with the flaws of Armenians.

Lemon cucumbers, known in some quarters as apple cukes, are a favorite of mine. The size and shape of tennis balls, with a prickly skin and yellow color, they are so seed-filled and moist that juice literally drips from the fruit. Gardening articles virtually always advise picking Lemons while they are small, oblong and yellowish white. However, I like the tougher texture the skins take on as they reach full size, so I leave mine on the vine until they are lemon yellow and full-sized.

This was a good year for cukes, with both old favorites and all three newcomers performing admirably. If you only have room for one or two varieties, try Kidmas or Holland Hybrids. But if you like vegetable oddities, give Lemons, Armenians or Painted Serpents a go.